Skip to content

Musicpervs Posts

Gratitude 101 – Shalu Kayastha

Published July 11, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Katha: Episode 3 | Marijau | Sajjan Raj Vaidya x Bikki Gurung

Shalu Kayastha.

part i

This was the day-to-day reality of her life.

She was born and raised in grave poverty. Wherein scarcity, dispute, conflict-of-finances, dissatisfaction, discontentment, and worst a mocking nihilism was a way of life.

Nevertheless, whenever we met, she radiated to me a rare, genuine blend of heart warming contentment with whatever could’ve been afforded or say’ could’ve been provided for, by her family — in terms of what's in the plate, what is on her body and what's over the head  inclusive. Despite? Despite! Delightful. Holy. Jolly. Happy. Go. Lucky.  — Breathing. Giggling. Playing. Smiling — she also had mountains and mountains of love along with strong sense of purpose and a sheer will for growth and contribution in her life.

Not everyone knew though, but she terribly wept at times. In ordinary slow days and on so, so many quiet nights, largely for her terrible, wrecking, vengeful, out-of-control, demanding, crushing, cruel, cruel and damn cruel luck. Alone! Mostly, comprehending the fact that she was brought up by two very hardworking, but low income earning parents.

part 2

However, without any shred of doubt, and from how I remember her, she gracefully accepted everything so damn courageously. Did every-fucking-thing that she must do as any obedient and disciplined and well-rounded human (or say’ specially our own sons and daughters) are expected to willingly and heartily do.

She had dutifully supported her parents in all their chores; and like any teenage girl she’d also post as many photographs of them on her facebook wall on different occasions. Long story short, she had gleefully contributed her compassionate share into re-organizing and re-shaping her family matters amid waves of constant chaos and blinding sense of depression, deprivation, self doubts and self-contemplation.

I reckon it’s absurd to even think, but putting myself in her shoes, what I feel in my gut is  — whatever had her wake up every morning and live and expend and fight every fucking day; like literally every.other.fucking.day, at the core must be COURAGE!

Courage to take responsibility of her shit. And act.

Courage to be optimistic and hope for better and brighter days ahead. And persevere.

Courage to make her life helpful and meaningful irrespective of pain and suffering. Courage!

part 3

Now this aches my heart to confront that I can only wish she had lived LONGER!

Long enough to live her FULL life.

(internal dialogue…)

How could I’ve known that the last time we had met and sat together, and talked to each-other on that blue bus was indeed our last ride for this lifetime.

I still remember, even at that moment of our final exchange; deep down inside, I was honestly, truthfully very proud of her; for all her sacrifices, her calm, kind and blissful energy which she radiated.

Not in my lifetime (of course, unless sickened with dementia or other brain diseases), I will never forget waving her that final goodbye as I rushed out of that public transport’s door!

 

We lost her in April, Earthquake of 2015.

Shalu Kayastha!

That evening, we cremated her muddied body, and her muddied potentials, and her muddied courage.

 

This

my unbeknownst friends,

…

is a real story of a 20 years old girl.

This my dear friends,

is an epitome of true courage in the face value of true despair!

And, that my friend for ultimately what occurred

is a real loss, … real suffering.

This my dear friends,

… is pure grief. Naked!

part 4

A fat takeaway — you are fucking alive! She’s not!

So, no matter how shitty the scene is to you of your own inventories in life, no matter how much pain and unjustness have painted their claw marks in your life — you will always be one UP from her. Because, you have a chance in life.

You have the potential to overcome any … any fucking obstacles.

You just don’t know it yet!

 

As Jordan B. Peterson says,

Life is suffering, so get your act together!

 

So, Gratitude 101 – Shalu Kayastha.

 

 

Comments closed

Digital Minimalism

Published July 4, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Peter Doran – Every Little Thing

Dear readers,

Have you realized lately, that you hardly have time to do anything meaningful?

Anything, that really brings true joy in your life?

Anything, that’d help itch the lasting sense of satisfaction and fulfillment in your long-term memory?

 

Between obligatory work-overload and irritating noise slash distractions.

Between constant meeting schedules slash meaningless catchups.

Between superficial forced-chats with fake friends, and a persistent craving for dopamine shots  — as a result of the strong efficacies of slot machine effect  duly experimented around social media apps, in the name of maximizing user engagement (you remember, those scroll-down refresh feature in the apps we see).

Sure enough, our eyeballs; our most priceless attention-span and most importantly our precious time, certainly, has become somebody else’s money.

It’s appalling! 

 

At the best of times, when science and technology, in-spite of empowering us and be at our service, has predominantly cheated and stolen from us.

At the best of times, when we deserve to live life freely and live it well; we are undoubtedly slaves of our phones and all the ephemeral pleasures we get from consuming largely bullshit information(in the name of ads and promotion and creative artifacts, et cetera).

At the best of times, when technology should be bringing us together has instead done just quite the opposite.

 

We definitely need a way out.

And, that my friend is Digital Minimalism  or Digital Declutter.

 

Contextually speaking:

Author of Sapiens, Yuval Noah Harari quotes,

“In a world deluged by irrelevant information, clarity is power.”

Cal Newport, a computer science professor and the author of Deep work says,

“Clarity about what matters provides clarity about what does not.”

And, in a book The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday, he writes,

“Endless pleasure becomes its own form of punishment.”

In the same token, Young Seneca, on his essay The Shortness of Time, explains,

It is not that we have a short space of time, but that we waste much of it. Life is long enough, and it has been given in sufficiently generous measure to allow the accomplishment of the very greatest things if the whole of it is well invested. But when it is squandered in luxury and carelessness, when it is devoted to no good end, forced at last by the ultimate necessity we perceive that it has passed away before we were aware that it was passing.So it is—the life we receive is not short, but we make it so, nor do we have any lack of it, but are wasteful of it.

[…]

And last but not the least; from one of my favorite maxims shared by the minimalists, where-in they’ve stated:

“Glowing screen is the new smoking.”

 

This lead us to derive one straight, simple fact; And that is — it is our individual responsibility to be clear, concise and truly intentional regarding the consumption of technology per se, and better late than never reclaim our mortal time in the process!

 

p.s., It’s been a month I’ve deleted an instagram app on my phone (excluding, every Thursdays'). This way, I drive and balance my use of social media and not the other way around.

p.p.s. Put off your phone now! And, Carpe diem!

 

Yours,

Digital Minimalist

Comments closed

Kairos or Chronos?

Published June 26, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Gravity – John Mayer

Two Greek words both defining  Time  however, clearly from a contradicting perspective.

Kairos referring  Quality of Time whereas Chronos to the Quantity of Time. As Jermy Arnold quotes best, ” Chronos was just a way of describing time in a chronological sense”. Meaning, Chronos is sequential time, i.e. It’s about the order of the world. The Sun rises then sets. The moon moves through the sky in a predictable path. They define our days and months. This is to say that the wrinkles etched on your face is chronos. On contrary, Kairos is about the subjective experience of living within time. They are the moments you spend with your loved ones, the moments of beautiful elation, of sheer happiness and fulfillment and joy and satisfaction.”

Simply put, the two have a fundamental difference of minutes and moments.

That, we experience chronos when we are impatiently waiting for something to be over and done with. Whereas, we’d experience kairos when we are so deeply engrossed in an activity that time seems to stand still. That, in kairos we feel in control of our time, whereas in chronos, it’s quite the opposite, we feel mostly fucked! Stressed per se.

Now let’s see:

Imagine you are walking on a street, earphones are plugged in playing your favorite song. There are people walking around you. Vehicles moving around you. A normal day for you nothing special about it, you won’t even have to be in the moment, the motor skills of your body takes care of everything. But then you saw a lady fell down on the road, and all of a sudden you are in the moment; You plug-out your earphones, run to the lady and help her get up, ask if she is fine. You offer her some water, make her rest, check for the bruises and calm her down. After assuring she’d be fine, you then leave plugging your earphones back and continue the walk but this time you have a wide smile on your face, since you help an unknown person without expecting anything in return.

[pullquote]at first the time was just flowing for you like Chronos but after seeing the lady fell on the ground, the time becomes a moment like Kairos.[/pullquote]

That is the difference between chronos and kairos — at first the time was just flowing for you like Chronos but after seeing the lady fell on the ground, the time becomes a moment like Kairos.

Sure thing, in the times where kids have grown and gone, where, we are continuously muddling along in a career’s slippery road, making a living, and just existing out of habit more than anything, and well sadly, knowingly or unknowingly, waiting to die some–day; the actualization of realization to living a kairos fueled life in this chronos world has become of a grave importance.

And, because, the problem for all of us is that the clock keeps ticking the wrong way and we are losing moments to the past, out of our reach, never to be regained.

This informative piece is a subtle reminder to you my dear friends, kairos or chronos?

Comments closed

Rule no 6 Re-defined

Published June 20, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Nine – Sleeping At Last

European Philosopher, René Descartes once famously theorized, “Cogito, ergo sum.” Which translates to english as, “I think, therefore I am.” Meaning – our act of thinking about thoughts of thoughts is a proof of our existence, and vice-versa.

 

So, about my thoughts on thoughts?

Simple, It’s all our head!

 

Call it, the chatbot. Call it Knowledge or the illusion of it.

Call it, a breathing menace. Kindness. Fear. Judgement. Complications. Solutions. Anxiety. Grace.

Call it the epitome of crazy-badshit-shenanigans or the manmade definition of normal.

Call it happiness or a fucking sadness.

 

Heed carefully, thoughts, they manifests in the language we speak. The tone we ensue. Conclusions we draw. Wave we create. World we see. Attitudes and behaviors that surfaces and bespeaks. In our ignorance. In our suffering. In Buddha that shelters inside us. And also in Monkey that annoys us from inside-out.

Thoughts; good or bad, healthy or harrowing, healing or hammering has absolutely no congruency, no connections, matter of fact — nothing to do with the reality of things we call Life! Not a fragment of shit!

 

Surgically dissect any thoughts that is ruminating around your head for quite sometime now. And, you won’t be surprised to acknowledge or to realize that these self-inflicted, illusionary warm-hole of mental excreta, have entirely no tangible objectifications, no logical expression, no forms, no substance, but mostly a crap-load-of gibberish, self-serving, disguised, deluded, non-sensical cocksureness; successfully creating a gigantic blackhole of blindspots and simultaneously also insinuating horse-shit-of deafening confusions and the illusion of realism.

Thing is, thoughts  have no flesh, no leash, no control over itself, no concrete floodgates. Thoughts are abstract, non-existential, paralyzing, decapitating. Emptying. Suffocating. Painful!

A tweet from @KapilGuptaMD, “Few men come to realize that their entire life has been lived inside their mind” surfaces on my twitter feed rightfully validates this thesis on my school of thoughts about thoughts.

 

Now, the question remains, how to not give in to our own alley alike enemy called thoughts?

Precisely, how to filter thoughts!

Well, rule no 6 says,

“Don’t take yourself so damned seriously!”

Why?

Because, If you take life (or your own thoughts in the language of René) too damn seriously, you miss out on the joy and the adventure life defaults at. You expect. You complain. You get too attached to your self-serving-self.

So, unsolicited piece of advice:

Mostly, help yourself to BE lightweight as you abide by DTYSDS platitude, so that you can in any given day, help somebody who’s in need of your help!

Mostly, chill so that you don’t feed yourself the drug of nihilism!

 

To the nutshell :-

Don’t take yourself so damned seriously is undoubtedly the right tool out of the box to weaponize yourself from your own thoughts!

Good luck!

 

And one last thing

Presenting you a story woven around Rule number Six

Two prime ministers were sitting in a room discussing affairs of state.  Suddenly an aide burst in, shouting and stamping and banging his fist on the desk.  The host prime minister quietly said, “Peter, kindly remember Rule Number Six.”  Peter was instantly restored to complete calm, apologized for the interruption, and left the room.  The prime ministers resumed their discussion.  Several minutes later, another aide rushed in, shouting and stamping.  Again the host prime minister quietly said, “Marie, please remember Rule Number Six.”  Marie calmed down immediately, apologized, and left the room.

The visiting prime minister said “I’ve seen many things in my life, but never anything as remarkable as this.  Tell me, what is this Rule Number Six?”  The host prime minister said, “It’s really very simple.  Rule Number Six is ‘Don’t take yourself so damned seriously.’”  After a moment of pondering, the visiting prime minister inquired, “And what, may I ask, are the other rules?”

The host replied, “There aren’t any.”

 

Comments closed

What a shit!

Published June 14, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Vance Joy – Riptide

No riches ever bought a single second.

And we are here mostly wasting this priceless, non-renewable resource slash wealth slash commodity called time :-

  • over dead-end jobs you hate from the deepest of your weeping heart,
  • over relationships that’s killing the life out of you and your fucking soul,
  • over glowing screens and infinitely streaming youtube fcuking videos,
  • over never-enough social media pornography and inorganic, nonsensical vomits,
  • over ruminating, unhealthy, self-defeating, substance-less brain farts,
  • over naysayers’ commentaries, allegations and fucked judgements,
  • over ephemeral pleasures and unwise enslavement around gaining and chasing of superfluous stuffs,
  • over weighing ignorance and irresponsible life choice,
  • over fear of missing out,
  • over inevitable  flinches,
  • over fear of fears.

What a shit!

    Bonus track here!     

Comments closed

Motivational? This isn’t one.

Published June 6, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

 Richard Marx – Right Here Waiting

Nothing like ever: we live in a volatile, information-overload era, where delicate stuffs like motivations are superfluously sold over cheap fabrications of   social-media businesses   such as   youtube ,   instagram  and sorts.

I am not selling anything here. And, Motivational? This isn’t one at all.

No, this isn’t any phony, hollow-motivational-crap or some kind of ‘never-enough‘ inspirational ecstasy pill per se — which for so long, our brain has been so fcuk*ng stoned with. Rather, this is an honest unpacking of a disciplined truth that silently screams of the role of real, real work  — in building something of real value.

[Side note: I’d like to dedicate this subtle, hard-core, spot-on, beautiful piece of work from Coach Sommer to my fellow troops back in the office.]

xx

Tim Ferriss’ book Tools of The Titans showcases an exchange between the author himself and coach Christopher Sommer, former men’s gymnastics national team coach, who, in an email wrote explaining the value of “the single decision.”

Tim, in his book writes:

We all get frustrated.

I am particularly prone to frustration when I see little or no progress after several weeks of practicing something new.

Despite Coach Sommer’s regular reminders about connective-tissue adaptations taking 200 to 210 days, after a few weeks of flailing with “straddle L extensions,” I was at my wits’ end. Even after the third workout, I had renamed them “frog spaz” in my workout journal because that’s what I resembled while doing them: a frog being electrocuted.

Each week, I sent Coach Sommer videos of my workouts via Dropbox. In my accompanying notes at one point, I expressed how discouraging it was to make zero tangible progress with this exercise.

Below is his email response, which I immediately saved to Evernote to review often.

It’s all great, but I’ve bolded my favorite part:

“Hi Tim,

Patience. Far too soon to expect strength improvements. Strength improvements [for a movement like this] take a minimum of 6 weeks. Any perceived improvements prior to that are simply a result of improved synaptic factilitation. In plain English, the central nervous system simply became more efficient at that particular movement with practice. This is however, not to be confused with actual strength gains.

Dealing with the temporary frustration of not making progress is an integral part of the path towards excellence. In fact, it is essential and something that every single elite athlete has had to learn to deal with. If the pursuit of excellence was easy, everyone would do it. In fact, this impatience in dealing with frustration is the primary reason that most people fail to achieve their goals. Unreasonable expectations time-wise, resulting in unnecessary frustration, due to a perceived feeling of failure. Achieving the extraordinary is not a linear process.

The secret is to show up, do the work, and go home.

A blue collar work ethic married to indomitable will. It is literally that simple. Nothing interferes. Nothing can sway you from your purpose. Once the decision is made, simply refuse to budge. Refuse to compromise.

And accept that quality long-term results require quality long-term focus. No emotion. No drama. No beating yourself up over small bumps in the road. Learn to enjoy and appreciate the process. This is especially important because you are going to spend far more time on the actual journey than with those all too brief moments of triumph at the end.

Certainly celebrate the moments of triumph when they occur. More importantly, learn from defeats when they happen. In fact, if you are not encountering defeat on a fairly regular basis, you are not trying hard enough. And absolutely refuse to accept less than your best.

Throw out a timeline. It will take what it takes.

If the commitment is to a long-term goal and not to a series of smaller intermediate goals, then only one decision needs to be made and adhered to. Clear, simple, straightforward. Much easier to maintain than having to make small decision after small decision to stay the course when dealing with each step along the way. This provides far too many opportunities to inadvertently drift from your chosen goal. The single decision is one of the most powerful tools in the toolbox.”

-From “Tools of The Titans” by Tim Ferriss

 

xx
Comments closed

The Man Than I Was Yesterday

Published May 30, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Neil Halstead – Wittgenstein’s Arm

A Warm, inviting bed.

A roof over the head.

 

Full stomach.

Empty brain.

 

Yellow light.

Quiet night.

 

Right songs.

Simple Life.

 

Beholding view of this soulful, dead, silent road at sight.

Black tea, a peaceful, mellow date — with my — s.e.l.f.

And at last;

Slowly. Surely. In the process of self-revision, self-examination and self-correction.

Unbecoming. Becoming — the man than I was yesterday.

 

p.s. Thanks for the song dai!

Comments closed

Don’t waste your time

Published May 23, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Osho Jain – Khush To Hai Na

Annie Dillard unpacks an age old, wise adage, “How you spend your day is how you spend your life.” in her fabulous, beautifully cooked book ‘The Writing Life’

And so did, few super, fat, big questions floated on the surface from deep down the marrow of my weightless bones :-

How does your perfect day look like?

How you feeling? Fu<>ked?

Do you really enjoy your work? Are you inspired to stretch a little too far?

Do you love yourself enough, minus self-obsession plus healthy, sexy, humble self-esteem?

Do you seriously take care of yourself?

Are you aware of your and your loved one’s fleeting mortality?

Slave or free?

Unsure? Cock sure? Healthy self-doubt?

Driven by fear or fulfillment?

Sleeping enough?

Fake (misled, biased) ? or Fairly authentic (organic facts, less biased)?

I suggest, and before it is too late, and the sooner the better — you start asking these defining questions of life in your wild one-life!

 

And, yeah! On an ending note: Once a guy named William Shakespeare in his drama ‘Hamlet’ quote, “Brevity is the soul of wit.”

Well, my stranger internet friend, my mentor Paul Graham succinctly suggests in one of his thought provoking essays as he writes, “Don’t ignore your dreams; don’t work too much; say what you think; cultivate friendship; be happy.”

 

So, hey, and for real — don’t waste your f<cki>g time!

Just, keep it nice and simple stupid!

p.s a bonus track tonight!

Good night!

Comments closed

Fail better

Published May 16, 2019 By Bijay Shrestha

Vintage Culture, Bruno Be & Ownboss – Intro Rework

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gx46AlY758

She asked, “How to be confident?”. I asked only two things of her. Two maxims per se. One, Be comfortable with the uncomfortable. And two, don’t fret, be fiercely fearless as you walk down the alley of the unknown. This is how you best exercise your confidence muscle.

What I had missed was, “Confidence is also about digesting lucrative failures and/ or rejections. Meaning, confidence is a wise failure in disguise. Meaning, to be confident, you learn to befriend failure. Not shrug if off your shoulder or wry but have failures be that combusting fuel propelling you at rocket speed each time you take one.”

Following essay by Adam Gottesfeld from Princeton University precisely encapsulates this idea than any other. Have a great time!

Fail Better BY ADAM GOTTESFELD

MOST PRINCETON students love to procrastinate in writing their dean’s date [term] papers. Ryan Marrinan ’07, from Los Angeles, was no exception. But while the majority of undergraduates fill their time by updating their Facebook profiles or watching videos on YouTube, Marrinan was discussing Soto Zen Buddhism via e-mail with Randy Komisar, a partner at the venture capital firm Kleiner Perkins Caufield and Byers, and asking Google CEO Eric Schmidt via e-mail when he had been happiest in his life. (Schmidt’s answer: “Tomorrow.”)

Prior to his e-mail, Marrinan had never contacted Komisar. He had met Schmidt, a Princeton University trustee, only briefly at an academic affairs meeting of the trustees in November. A self-described “naturally shy kid,” Marrinan said he would never have dared to randomly e-mail two of the most powerful men in Silicon Valley if it weren’t for Tim Ferriss, who offered a guest lecture in Professor Ed Zschau’s “High-Tech Entrepreneurship” class. Ferriss challenged Marrinan and his fellow seniors to contact high-profile celebrities and CEOs and get their answers to questions they have always wanted to ask.

For extra incentive, Ferriss promised the student who could contact the most hard-to-reach name and ask the most intriguing question a round-trip plane ticket anywhere in the world.

“I believe that success can be measured in the number of uncomfortable conversations you’re willing to have. I felt that if I could help students overcome the fear of rejection with cold-calling and cold e-mail, it would serve them forever,” Ferriss said. “It’s easy to sell yourself short, but when you see classmates getting responses from people like [former president] George Bush, the CEOs of Disney, Comcast, Google, and HP, and dozens of other impossible-to-reach people, it forces you to reconsider your self-set limitations.” … Ferriss lectures to the students of “High-Tech Entrepreneurship” each semester about creating a startup and designing the ideal lifestyle.

“I participate in this contest every day,” said Ferriss. “I do what I always do: find a personal e-mail if possible, often through their little-known personal blogs, send a two- to three-paragraph e-mail which explains that I am familiar with their work, and ask one simple-to-answer but thought-provoking question in that e-mail related to their work or life philosophies. The goal is to start a dialogue so they take the time to answer future e-mails—not to ask for help. That can only come after at least three or four genuine e-mail exchanges.”

With “textbook execution of the Tim Ferriss Technique,” as he put it, Marrinan was able to strike up a bond with Komisar. In his initial e-mail, he talked about reading one of Komisar’s Harvard Business Review articles and feeling inspired to ask him, “When were you happiest in your life?” After Komisar replied with references to Tibetan Buddhism, Marrinan responded, “Just as words are inadequate to explain true happiness, so too are words inadequate to express my thanks.” His e-mail included his personal translation of a French poem by Taisen Deshimaru, the former European head of Soto Zen. An e-mail relationship was formed, and Komisar even e-mailed Marrinan a few days later with a link to a New York Times article on happiness.

Contacting Schmidt proved more challenging. For Marrinan, the toughest part was getting Schmidt’s personal e-mail address. He e-mailed a Princeton dean asking for it. No response. Two weeks later, he e-mailed the same dean again, defending his request by reminding her that he had previously met Schmidt. The dean said no, but Marrinan refused to give up. He e-mailed her a third time. “Have you ever made an exception?” he asked. The dean finally gave in, he said, and provided him with Schmidt’s e-mail.

“I know some of my classmates pursued the alternative scattershot technique with some success, but that’s not my bag,” Marrinan said, explaining his perseverance. “I deal with rejection by persisting, not by taking my business elsewhere. My maxim comes from Samuel Beckett, a personal hero of mine: ‘Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.’ You won’t believe what you can accomplish by attempting the impossible with the courage to repeatedly fail better.”

Nathan Kaplan, another participant in the contest, was most proud of the way that he was able to contact former Newark mayor Sharpe James. Because James had made a campaign contribution to Al Sharpton, the website www.fundrace.org listed James’s home address. Kaplan then input James’s address into an online serach-by-address phone directory, through which he received the former mayor’s phone number. Kaplan left a message for James, and a few days later finally got to ask him about childhood education.

Ferriss is proud of the effort students have put into his contest. “Most people can do absolutely awe-inspiring things,” he said. “Sometimes they just need a little nudge.”

Comments closed