She confronts, she wants to die only after I pass away because I’m a mess without her. Rightly so!
I can’t imagine a day of my life without her.
I couldn’t be more happy we had that piece of conversation among many others things. Over texts though!
But, I hope this genuine feeling we have in our hearts means at least something or better yet Everything with capital ‘E’ for both of us — throughout our lives.
Enough!
For our best of times.
In crushing days.
During countless ordinaries we’re to walk together.
There used to be times when we were crazy over hoarding musics from 8tracks and share em’ a lot! This was before Spotify, Apple music, or YouTube for us. This was before I had any girlfriends!
😄😄
There used to be times when we use to work our ass off for 38 hours straight and still return back home content and cherry. Islington College will forever rock in our memories.
There used to be times when we use to delight over mo:mos and milk-tea and bike rides of Patan.
Our deep shit conversations late at night.
Our undisclosed, naked plights.
Our bantam secrets.
Our pure, once in a lifetime friendship-starship!
Our hours.
Our ours.
There used to be times when we use to think of being together — for forever!
There used to be times when all todays’ were effortlessly fecking awesome!
Tangal baucha, your playlist’s ready!
And, if anyone would like to have the playlist shared, please comment below with your email.
On the way back home this evening; as I drove past dusts and the dark, I cried again.
Cried for my wretched parts.
Cried for my unpopular, unbeknownst past.
I’ve known sobbing helps.
And, tears are a blessing when the pain is real, when the cut is rich!
Because, if you don’t know it yet, It’s how you actually heal yourself.
Despite, on most calendar days, you pretend to be strong and full but there are also days, you want to wear down that mask and just be by your all-self!
Well, tonight is one of those nights for me.
Immersive. Vulnerable. Reflective.
A whisper cries from within; Says, “You are enough, You know you are enough, stupid! You’reenough!”
[A thoughtful break. With deep, deep long breathes]
— reads his current facebook cover photo’s caption.
He’d been working at F1soft since May of 2014. I joined the club on December 31st, the same year.
Prelude: From our ‘तिमी‘ to ‘त‘, our journey together has brought me an immense joy as well as a deeper sense of fulfillment by virtue of our natural brotherhood chemistry. And, he’ll for sure have a special place in my life forever of forever!
But, hey, before you read any further, let’s be clear on one thing :- this is not about Pukar’s story. Truth be told, I’ve barely tracked or scratched his life’s timeline and plots and whereabouts.
Someone who takes responsibilities dead & dead seriously!
Star Wars. DC. Justice League. Deadpool. Holy! hard core Papon, Prateek Kuhad cum John Mayer admirer.Not to miss the Nepali products (@mheecha, @anthropose, @bhavproducts, karuna, what the fook not) plus Mumford & Sons, Radiohead on the list as well.
Adorable wisecracker. Sarcasm powerhouse!
Bhaley. Bhanubhakta and Lord Buddha.
As Seneca beautifully explains,
[su_quote]“If you consider any man a friend whom you do not trust as you trust yourself, you are mightily mistaken and you do not sufficiently understand what true friendship means… When friendship is settled, you must trust; before friendship is formed, you must pass judgment…Ponder for a long time whether you shall admit a given person to your friendship; but when you have decided to admit him, welcome him with all your heart and soul. Speak as boldly with him as with yourself… Regard him as loyal and you will make him loyal.” — Letters from a Stoic.[/su_quote]
It’s because of human like himself, I can believe in the words of the wise that friendship must be fucking unconditional as love ought to be.
Lastly, Pukar bro — yaar, don’t kill me for any of this!
Google Results of Pukar’s meaning.
p.s. Once, my source of good, subtle, suple music.
INEXPLICABLY fortunate to have found.
Now, HYAPPILY married!
Melophile.
Pardon, the jargon. Pardon profanity of our nighttime conversation.
Lucky, I have a brother who’s also my soul friend.
He is the reason why I never really cared about wasting energy in forced companionship.
For I was born with one forever friend and that’s him, a worthy heritage to forever flaunt, to forever flare.
Touch wood.
He is the reason why I’d never really care if somebody or anybody disses me, be yesterday, today or tomorrow.
He gave me an utter freedom to happily enjoy my lonesomeness. He is why I can be alone at will and still thrive because his cocoon was ever present whenever I needed one.
He never asked for my attention because he knew in his heart that he has my whole heart.
He was always there through most of my terrible thick and thins — gladly he lived my plights, my stories.
Glad, he still does.
Our humble relationship as twin brothers, or be it as the funniest two bones — will certainly end one day, not today.
I hope not ever.
p.s.We shared the same warmish womb together, didn’t we? And that’s the cutest thing I’ll forever cherish having done that with you.
A concise segue could be something more like ,”Pull Back From People Who Won’t Listen To You.” Or “Know your audience”, as they say. Or more so directly, “If people are not listening to you, stop talking to them!“
Cold. Isn’t it?
Let’s unpack.
What this simply means is: If you’re talking to someone or say trying to have a conversation but as it turns out that this person is no where near listening to what you have to say (by virtue of their deeply possessed stone-etched rigidity), then more often than not, it’s at your best interest that you shut the fuck up and save yourself an insult!
Why am i saying this?
Paraphrasing Jordan B. Peterson (one among many of my mentors); what he says is that — in cases like this, the one we’re right now putting a microscope on; there could only be two prospective certainties :-
One, if you somehow feel that the other person is not trying to engage and rather oxygenate conflicts after conflicts then you aren’t who they think you are.
Or, two, you’re not where you think you are! On plain sight, you are just somewhere you don’t belong! Not at least around a good influence!
Because you see, when you’re with people who don’t really listen, there’s no real dialogue occurring between you two, and sure enough this person you merely think you’re having a meaningful conversation with is clearly not interested in your say of the matter. And, by giving them your time and energy, you are just devaluing what you have to say by offering to an audience that reject it.
So, why give a fuck at all!
Peterson further advises, “If you stop talking to people who aren’t listening to you and start watching them instead, they’ll tell you what they’re up to.”
I just returned attending Puku’s wedding reception.
Sleep deprived. Exhausted. Feet too cold because of a long bike ride and that too on Kolhapuri chappal.
Here’s a thing worthy a mention cum appreciation — As i opened the door and entered my room; I found that the room heater was on. Plus, my meds were carefully put on the table, beneath the lamp which was on too, so that i can see.
I knew, that’s my dad!
What made this episode more special is that he was bed-ridden himself from the past two days.
p.s. I’m sneezing terribly as i sit to write this short quick piece in company of mild fever.
p.p,s. I just want to seize the gratifying beauty of this unique moment painted by my beloved Father (not that this has happened for the first time).
Holy cow, what could’ve been a better way end to the day!
