Musicpervs - A boy's journey through words and the mixtapes. I write every Thursday.

Working on my procrastination

Published August 27, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Concentrate every minute like a Roman – like a man – on doing what’s in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly, with justice. And on freeing yourself from all other distractions. Yes, you can – if you do everything as if it were the last thing you were doing in your life, and stop being aimless, stop letting your emotions override what your mind tells you, stop being hypocritical, self-centered, irritable. You see how few things you have to do to live a satisfying and reverent life? If you can manage this, that’s all even the gods can ask of you.
Marcus Aurelius (Meditation)

Mree – Goodnight & Goodbye

It’s been a while I’ve noticed a metastasizing cancer within me; Of putting off things for an indefinite period of time, of looking for motivational-porn to do things that are demanding and utterly important!

Sure, I was a procrastinator before as well. And then, I wasn’t like that anymore. But then, I’m again — a human.

I want to confess. I’m working on my procrastination.

Truth be told: I’m trying to explore cum reclaim ‘Today’ (with as much stretch of imagination, possible) and Postpone ‘Someday’.

If you care to dig more into what I’m saying, Joshua Fields Millburn — one of my mentor has put this beautiful animated clip on their channel. What hurts me most is that I knew all this.

In the nutshell, I’m trying to gain control over the steering wheel of my life once again, and for sure, this journey of finding myself has re-taught me that the choices I make each day, matters more than I’ll ever know!

Which is why, Goodbye and Goodnight for today folks. For, I’ve something more important tonight.

Lastly, the video below is without-a-doubt a rare pearl in the ocean from the channel I’d been long following — if you want to truly navigate around the waters of procrastination from the stoic perspective.

Namaste.

Comments closed

Simple. Little. Things.

Published August 20, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

It’s sad. Most of us don’t realize what we have unless we don’t have it, anymore.
Musicpervs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc8_xB7I6lo

Ajnabee – Little Things

In a world where real love is a lot of hard work where friction is inevitable.
And true love still, is never a conflict-free love.

Never take him .... Not, to take her...
Yes, don't you make a mistake of taking your beloved for granted!

p. s. Remember. The Balance Sheet of love also has Assets, Liabilities, Expenses, Overdrafts and Adjustments.

Let's start from there.

Little things in relationships.

If you’re a vivid reader of this small blog; You must’ve come across many such posts that speaks of the must haves’ and the havenots’ — recipes for a ‘good-enough’ relationships.

I’m certain I’ve spoken enough, in imaginable length, breadth and the depth about the real.love.ingredients that make up for a real.love.relationships. A pure partnership per se or simply Friendship. The genuine Reciprocity. Loads and loads of Humor, for sure. The unadulterated Honesty. Radiating and re-assuring Emotional Security. Shared Responsibility. Non-judgementism, Appreciation and Acceptance. Non-negotiable Understanding and a strong, very strong Support System. The Non-negotiable Respect too. Heavy stuff like organic, mutual growth, best jokes. and so on and so forth.

But, Shit! Have I written anything about simple.little.things which actually, and in reality make up for a large portion of the ‘daily grind’ that any…. any well-nourished, balanced and well-maintained r.e.l.a.t.i.o.n.s.h.i.p.s — Go Through ->

Nope! Not that I recall.

^{Src: https://www.instagram.com/threeundertherain/}

[Sidenote: She asked me if I’d write on ‘little things’ after having binged Netflix series ‘Little Things‘ together.]

So, here I am. And, here it is.

Frankly, I don’t have 10 little, secret things you can do to pump up and launch your relationship to a sweet-next level, with your partner in crime, but sure I have some food for thoughts to share on the same.

[haha]

Cool.

So, allow me to present to you my flavor of ‘little things’ that we all can do.

A simple wake up and wind down texts.
Explore overlapping interests. May be food. Travel. Games. Pick anything. And do them. Freaking indulge,… responsibly though.
Watch movies together. Eat ice-cream, drink coffee, enjoy your mint lemonade whatever you like. Go to concerts together. Cook together. Find out and solve problems together. Go, shopping together. Do weird, silly stunts together — merely for a bellyful of laughs and gasps. Doesn’t have to make sense! Share, listen to songs together. Dance together for no reason. Unpack your whole package together. … Don’t think dirty! [haha]
Ask stupid questions. Ask, how was your day, How you feeling, questions? Take meaningless selfies. Make funny, stupid videos. Bitch about life’s unfairness and it’s suckers.
Plus, an advice from my married-best-friend, “Take things lightly whenever you have disagreements and talk about it later with cool head”.
Give each other sweet, little, frequent surprises. Take each other out for unplanned treat, retreats [emphasis added].
Oh yeah! And please compliment. Compliment dudes.
Kiss. Cuddle. Chumpy. Massage. Shower. Walk. Do Tik-toks if you have to.
Encourage one another. Just Be.there.for.each.other — side-by-side, nail and flesh.
Take inventories of each other’s favorite things as well as painful problems. Listen. Listen, and help each other out when things aren’t right.
Make your significant other feel he/she is special and taken care of and taken care for.

Life’s good if little things are taken care of man. And I guess, rest will follow.

p.s. Enjoy One of those days for a secret to a perfect relationship.

p.p.s I’m also learning bits and pieces in this department.

Comments closed

Endless Scrolling

Published August 13, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

^{Sajjan Raj Vaidya – Phutki Jaaney Jovan}

I wait for Thursdays. Trust me, it is always a blank page and orgy of thoughts.

Well, few housekeeping since last Thursday.

I and my girlfriend opened my long deactivated facebook account. It’s a pacific of cool past shits. I’m certain she’s already dived deep to the bottom of the holy ocean.
Sadly, one of my cousin sister contracted COVID19. She’s recovering gracefully.
Uploaded my first IGTV video. Made with Final Cut Pro.
Created a simple family video. Again, refreshed Final Cut Pro skill.
A cousin brother ‘Nijal Shrestha’ eventually got admitted to ‘Nepal Police Academy’ for his 8th standard after three years of attempts after attempts in a row.
Working on my daily habits cum routine. Hopefully, I’ll soon be back to my 9PM-3AM sleep habit. And, not to forget, she’s also doing everything she can to get me back on my previously adored routine. See, she’s a keeper!
Getting my hands on guitar at least once a day.
Trying to have as much fun with Grand ma. I visit her every day (except for rainy evenings) and we trash talk a lot and laugh our privileged arsee out loud!

That’s long enough already. And sorry for wasting your time.

Now, without further ado, serving you the main dish of the day — yeah, Endless scrolling it is!

First, before I spill science, I want to quickly kick off with my curiosity for ya’all

[ intentional pause ]

Are you also guilty of being a happy prisoner of a social media factory

this seemingly rewarding but profoundly pacifying; this amazing but largely fake and deceiving; this so-easy-to-use but so-easy-to-get-consumed by-and hooked-into; this dopamine inducing, which is not bad in itself but also self-control-shaking and tirelessly,… numbingly habituating us to seek validations and approvals and conformations from others?

If you say —

Hell no!

I fucking love this shit and I love my phone.

Period!

Then, please, don’t bother going any further.

It’s okay.

However, if you are like me who agrees to be sicken with this disease and duly accept the mindless wandering out into the woods of conformity business of social media, then, let’s get our mind dirty one more time with digging and exploring.

So, only five questions to keep this simple.

Question 1: Why do you think ‘Youtube’ has a ‘Recommendation or Explore‘ section with endless videos-autoplay feature?

Question 2: Why do you think facebook’s video feature is also endless with one video after another and then another ?

Question 3: Why do you think instagram has ‘explore‘ feature with endless photographs, stories, and mostly stupid yet sophisticated and seemingly interesting videos after videos of strange people you don’t know and from strange accounts you barely care?

Question 4: Ask, are these social media really, connecting us or just making us more anti-social … and more stupid? Endlessly?

Question 5: How often do you check to see if how many people reacted to your social media posts? How. Many. Times?

Don’t you think it’s weird and fishy?

Rephrasing one of my mentor, Niall Breslin as he says that Our eye balls — meaning our attention, our focus,… our time in general scheme of things are like oils for companies of today. They want to control it, …matter of fact they want to own it!.”

And the science I was talking about,… is so beautifully put together in a short roughly 10 minutes video I’m about to share it with you.

My say: Download this into your brain as you listen every single word there. And take back the control of your life’s wheel.

My message: Stop. Fake. Reality.

P.S. My sincere gratitude and thanks to three of my mentors in the video: Cal Newport (Author: Deep Work), Jordan Peterson (Author: 12 Rules for life) and Simon Sinek (Author: Leaders Eat Last)

P.S. Hats off to ‘Absolute Motivation’ curator for the video.

Enjoy!

You Will Wish You Watched This Before You Started Using Social Media | The Twisted Truth

Comments closed

Musicpervs.

Published August 6, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Someone in the world needs to hear what YOU have to say.
Mel Robbins

Anuv Jain – ALAG AASMAAN

This late afternoon, I confronted to one of my nieces, Reebhusha Amatya on the whys, whens and the hows of ‘Musicpervs’.

On why Musicpervs exist in the first place. On exactly when, the idea of this multimedia blog manifested. On how sadness, yes, you read that right; On how numbing grief — actually painted, tainted, resurrected and re-shaped the edges and perhaps the whole of this small headspace of my private-public life’s journey.

As one of my mentors Mel Robbins says it so eloquently and with such vulnerability and emotions, “Someone in the world needs to hear what YOU have to say.…” And, hands down, I am just as convinced that I had been musicperving for almost a decade now for the same exact reason. Musicpervs is my story in toto.

Sidenote: Do yourself a favor and watch ‘Motivation is garbage‘ from her.

Expanding further and in the words of Mel herself —

“There’s something inside of you. A life lesson. A story. Wisdom. Something that you are meant to share with the world. And, has it occurred to you — that right now, somewhere in the world, s.o.m.e.o.n.e is searching for you. Someone is destined to connect with you, to meet with you, to hear your story.

You could be a high school kid who’s struggling. You could be an entrepreneur. You could be an accountant. But there’s something inside of you that somebody is searching for, and your job is to find the courage to get out of your comfort zone and share your story and share your wisdom and show up in b.i.g.g.e.r ways. Because, I believe that discovering who you are, that’s meant for you; Sharing who you are and what you’ve learned that’s your purpose for the world!“

Mel robbins learned the lesson from her Yoga instructor Braxton.

So, all in all, Musicpervs, if you’re not aware, merely, authentically, seek to share a recipe but not the recipe to living one complete, graceful and beautiful LIFE from my lens, from people I learn from, from books I read, talks I listen to, things I observe and details I ponder over. Be them raw, perfect or overcooked; Musicpervs from a point-blank is about becoming, discovering, sharing, helping!

Namaste.

p.s. a bonus live track, I enjoy almost every-time I hear it, for you.

Comments closed

Relationship 101

Published July 30, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

drapetomania
(n.) an overwhelming urge to run away

Pop Smoke Feat. 50 Cent & Roddy Ricch – “The Woo”

Few personal housekeeping this week: Found a journal I use to write at back in early 2009 days. Stumbled upon a photograph of mine of the only zoo visit I’ve had at Jawalakhel when I was probably 10 or 12. Talked to my best friend Manish after such a long gap. Book I’m reading right now — NOBODY WANTS TO READ YOUR SH*T by Steven Pressfield, Re-reading, The Obstacle is the way — Ryan Holiday. Trimmed beard, clean. Dusted off guitar once again. Let’s see! On an only-veg diet for a week (took a stomach worm pill.. haha). Came back on instagram. I average 1hr 11m a day. This is bad!

Fuse – On with Bajra boro, Mooley and Mooli.

Today, I want to talk about Fucked up relationship. Because, that’s what’s trending these days. Isn’t it?

Relationship 101.

So, what precisely is a good-for-gone relationships like?

Simple.

Without undemanding respect.

Without mutual reciprocity.

Without shared responsibilities.

Without downright reliability.

Without rap!

My unsolicited advice :-

Contemplate!

Talk through-and-through, through the depths and the shallowness.

Openly,

Kindly!

Try to Fix.

Sure, T

And, if it doesn’t feel right; Freaking Get out before it grabs you by your neck.

Namaste.

Comments closed

Ass Holes

Published July 23, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Fun – All Right

Raise a glass for Ashmita Bajracharya!

The original author behind this piece.

Let’s begin!

Call it our tragedy, a curse, the disease to Humanity on a broader lens — that we have riches of Ass Holes in our lives. Owen Wilson in a movie ‘The Internship’ (Go watch, highly recommended) quotes, “… there’s always some joker who likes to play fuckaround. I guess that’s you, Graham.”

And most certainly, there are these kinds of weird clowns in almost e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e’s life.

The ones, always with an opinion over things with no skin-in-the-game.

Someone who gets immense high in belittling people (at every shot they get) with their satirical injections.

Someone pathologized with a superiority-f**ing-complex. Someone who thinks the world revolves around them and that they’re the messiah of truth and only but the truth and that everyone around them are stoned fuckers. Amazing sample ae’.

Someone who finds the likes of masturbatitious pleasure in poking at everyone’s business with their self-centered and blurred and baseless and contrived and limited and intelligently foolish belief system.

Someone who tries to shove-in their pathetic bullshits (mostly religious, or made-up-philosophical recipes) down your throat and into your blood system. These self-acclaimed Harbinger of truths and deceitful Geniuses.

Gross!

Only remember, they’re all-in … all-fucking-in — for lies, and for insults, and for bitching, and for complaining, and for inflicting fears, and for crushing your confidence, and for suffocating the innocence out of you and mushrooming self-doubts in you instead; and for merely, merely corrupting your life’s Operating System, yes, your fucking L.I.F.E with their super dense, and mindless, and careless, and heartless stupidity.

And, if you’re asking how to really notice these pathogens out-of-this-air?

Easy. Butt in the hole — chatbots!

Walaaaah ~~

Carbondioxide for life.

Dumbs for life.

p.s. You know what, spare a life of real cockroach.

But, Baegon these cockroaches from your kitchen!

Comments closed

I’m no hero

Published July 16, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Lama House – Secrets of the Earth

Perhaps, this is the first time I’m writing as I sit beside my grand mum. The song on the speaker is the one from Game of Thrones.

She sweetly complains [in newari], “What’s that song saying anyway [tries imitating the music] ? Is the song even good at all? We’ve good music here than the ones made in America. [laughs]”. Followed by a subtle, out-of-the-bloom inquiry, “Where’s your girlfriend from? [haha]”

I really love her company and her genuine curiosity and love for life and her toothless smile and her weird, self-made, profane songs.

Well, it is just that right now, the only thing I’m thinking about,… is, what ought I write about?

appointments went LIVE for full-fledge production release, on July 15, 2020, Wednesday afternoon.

Millions of applications, if not hundreds and thousands of them are launched every day, everywhere?

You may ask, why am i so hyped up about this one?

Well, for the most part; Because this one seemingly simple but wildly complicated project has been the only highlight of my lockdown story thus far.

I ate, slept, dreamt, toilet-ed, brushed, bathe, literally breathe, .. breathe, … every single day on this one idea. Fuck!

Matter of fact, Fuck my story.

Because it’d be ridiculous to not speak of the spine, the heroes, of the main spartans who had happily, willingly, heartily, evenly, gleefully, bravely, selflessly — sacrificed, yes, fucking S.A.C.R.I.F.I.C.E.D all of their blood, sweat and tears for this supple and wonderful child born out of pure dedication and commitment to create the best enterprise software experience we know.

Again, because only because of these few good men and women, eappointments has had her unique flavor of stories — stories of breaking and creating, trying and failing, embarrassments and triumphs, exhaustions and excitements, peaks and valleys, … storms and the calm.

Only, because of these skilled and talented minds, eappointments suspires today.

Only, because of their utterly selfless, priceless and speechless love and respect for work, for their duties and responsibilities eappointments is beautiful!

Whence, today, I’d like to take the opportunity to secretly, silently, truly and heart-fully thank the heroes behind her making:

In alphabetical order,

Ms. Dhanusha Roka | Business Analyst

Mr. Kaushal Regmi | Frontend, ReactJS

Mr. Rupak Chapagain | Backend, Java

Ms. Sabu Shakya | Frontend, ReactJS

Ms. Sauravi Thapa | Backend, Java

Ms. Smriti Mool | Backend, Java

Mr. Sudin Shakya | UI/UX

Truth be told,

I’m no hero.

You are!

Namo namo ~~

Comments closed

Ex.

Published July 9, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Inhale the future, exhale the past.
Unknown

Harry Styles – Falling

You must be in a fucking rat race, obviously. And, so, you’re exhausted because of the repetition of similar days and the ways the nights end for you — most of the time.

You feel empty, absolutely and ridiculously aimless. And, you crave momentary getaway — far, far-fetched from the core of reality.

You’re in a mood (meaning, you’re not clearly thinking). You’re drunk (meaning, f*ckin’ out-of-your head). And, every fu*king cell in your body feelingly screams, cries, craves, … they so fucking miss those good-old things, those wild, f*cking flings.

You’re tired of scrolling the same shits on your phone, obviously. You’re bored. And, something is intricately incomplete by your subconscious measurement. Most of all, the things you have today — they aren’t enough for you, are they?

Don’t lie to yourself myan but perhaps, every cell, every hair in your f*cking body selfishly yearns, shamelessly lusts for some form of lightning, enlightening gratification per se (sexual, non-sexual, and sometimes both).

You’ll scour the hell out of the internet like a desperate zombie. Perhaps, you’ll run through your old messages, the instagram, facebook, messenger, viber, whatsapp, snapchat, Hi5 (haha), … whatever you can get your hands on to crack open the way to your,

Ex.

It’s not your fault. The idea of reaching out to your former boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse via texts, phone calls, DM,or probably friend request.

Friend!

Really?

Dude, put that fucking phone down! Breathe.

Okay, allow me to explain. By evolution, we have one flaw.

This think tank; Our brain is weird, you know.

Because, precisely speaking, it never quite registers well — neither the pains of all the pains, the agony, de burns, the sufferings of the past and nor the moments of fattest happiness too. It’s crazy.

Personally speaking, no matter how much I try but I don’t really remember how I really, deeply, genuinely it felt when I had my last breakup.

For sure, I know I cried but F.U.C.K, why? I ask.

[haha]

And this is the same, same reason why we mostly, feelingly, BLINDLY, fucking wholeheartedly go back to the same devil we know, who once raped and ripped us naked and cold blooded.

Don’t!

For fuck sake, stop wasting your time and energy and yeah’ this life in general. Open up your f*cking gifted eyes, and stop running monkeys on the La la land of break-up songs, the comeback songs.

And, dude, try this song than this.

Or, go explore some other random shits like this one.

Finally. Well, despite all this Mahabharata cum Ramayana; if you still chose to just give it a jerk to that jerk off; I will say that there’s nothing for you there mayte’ except the same question I ask,

F.U.C.K, why?

In short,

Ex.

Ex-es.

Fucking excess.

Comments closed

Earnest. Relaxed. Proud

Published July 3, 2020 By Bijay Shrestha

Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.
That Tennyson

Arham Fulfagar- Waiting For You/ Intezaar

I want to remember this day for the rest of my life.

Because, today was supposed to be ours day.

Because, today we were supposed to finally reap the harvest of our small yet important dream.

Because, today was supposed to be an Earnest. Relaxed. Proud day, for the ERP team!

The app, ‘eappointments’, which, we had been working our asses off, which we had been long fighting tooth and nails for, were to eventually go LIVE by todays’ evening.

Alas!

At last, it didn’t come through as expected.

Matter of fact, this was supposed to be a breeze for all of us, after months and months of overtime, and nothing less than pure h.a.r.d work, and genuine dedication and love for responsibilities and love for work.

`Apology email to the client's spokesperson`

But.

Fuck it! I will for sure carry this beautiful feeling I had as we left tonight’s battlefield, lost by fate, maybe a bit disappointed, but then with an inexplicable taste of victory too.

For, despite unfair odds and circumstances, we did everything we could’ve possibly, possibly done to seal the deadline.

Plus, for me, ERP team once again did stand tall, proud, unmoved and bold despite unjust circumstances and tough, and demanding, and draining test of times!

Our bodies utterly exhausted, battered and yorkered-out. But our brow somehow, seemingly, … feelingly content and cheerful.

Because, ERP persevered!

Yes, I am profoundly grateful that,

Not for anything, but for each other, right till the finish line.