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Everyday I die

Published February 10, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha

Enjoy whatever you are going through. It’s not simple. It’s possible.

~author
Lewis Capaldi – Hold Me While You Wait

Food for brain. Epictetus wrote:

“Now is the time to get serious about living your ideals. How long can you afford to put off who you really want to be? Your nobler self cannot wait any longer. 

Put your principles into practice – now. Stop the excuses and the procrastination. This is your life! You aren’t a child anymore. The sooner you set yourself to your spiritual program, the happier you will be. The longer you wait, the more you’ll be vulnerable to mediocrity and feel filled with shame and regret, because you know you are capable of better. 

From this instant on, vow to stop disappointing yourself. Separate yourself from the mob. Decide to be extraordinary and do what you need to do – now.”

Everyday I feel grateful to be living the life I’m given. I must confront this is my ‘third’ life because there were time when chances were — just mere ‘chances’ between life and death.

Everyday I live for the two. One for myself, one for the one who wanted to. She use to say, there’s no point in living a life with a heavy heart and expensive baggage. I will never forget ‘that’ for the rest of my life. And, I have not seen anybody as her who wanted to cheat awaiting death just to l.i.v.e to see another day. She passed away right infront of me. She’ll forever be the constant background music in my life.

Everyday I thank my room (apparently a dorm where I’m living) before I leave her — ready to get sucked into the matrix of regular grind — for taking care of me and my dear belongings; for a good night sleep; for letting me keep my privacy; for warmth; for protection; for being a silent companion;

for always inviting me without expectations,

without judgements, and

without weights.

Everyday I question, how can I make my ‘today’ better than it was yesterday. Although I end up spending most of my time in an infinitely looping ‘Groundhog Day’. I try nevertheless.

Everyday I die. Everyday I try to be the better version of what, who and where I was.

Namaste.

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I love you

Published February 3, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha
Ed Sheeran – The Joker And The Queen 

I respect you.

I adore you.

Admire you.

I love you. I love you. And I love you!

Doesn’t matter If you don’t know me. Doesn’t matter if I don’t.

Doesn’t matter If you don’t talk to me. Doesn’t matter if I don’t.

Doesn’t matter if we our paths never cross. Doesn’t matter If you don’t have reasons to have me in your life.

Doesn’t matter if you don’t have time for me. Doesn’t … matter if you even hate me.

For,

all we are — are bags of unique, spilling stories.

For,

all we are — are flesh, bones, and miracle — trying to find our ways in this ever stretching time and tides of life.

For,

all we are — are hopeful voyagers with no objective destiny but shared path to a death.

For,

all we are — are strange friends to, by and for each other.

I love you for who you are.

I love you — for you exist!

Namaste.

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Simple Questions

Published January 27, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha

The answers are in the questions. Question! Question more. ~bijay.s

Anuv Jain – Alag Aasmaan

Simple questions.

What do you think of yourself?

What’s the self-image of yourself that you explain to yourself — every-time?

(stories that you tell yourself, every time)

What’s your best and the most practical and authentic bio (as we call it) that you know to be true of yourself?

(I’m not talking about those one or two lines we announce on our social media profiles)

Do you have fears? If yes, what is that? If yes, what are you doing about it?

Think. Write. Think again. Write again.

Does the self-image you carry with yourself revolve around something such as :-

On the phone too much, scrolling, tapping, waiting, anticipating, dreaming, mindlessly chatting.

Eating junks all the time.

Sugar addict.

Porn addict.

Or addicted to anything and everything you can imagine!

Ever Cheating. Ever Complaing. Ever Exhausted.

Ever Lying. Ever Postponing.

Ever … Empty!

Honestly —

Ask yourself,

Who am I for real?

What values do I carry or care for?

Do I have a purpose?

Do I have a path?

Or say, do I know where I’m headed?

And, am I going at all,

Or, am I just waiting for an imminent end.

Namaste!

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Beautiful Struggle & Sanity

Published January 25, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha

The person who carefully designs their daily routine goes further than the person that negotiates with themselves every day ~ Shane Parrish

Rolling in the Deep – Adele – FUNK cover feat. Sarah Dugas!

Before I begin: I didn’t publish last Thursday (Jan 20, 2021) because of the exam. I know it’s a good excuse but it was pre-meditated, deliberate and a necessary break. Let’s compensate it today.

Wise words are fundamentally simple.

Simple to chew.

Simple to digest.

Most important of all, Simple to ‘last’.

For the past few weeks, I myself was going through a soul-searching journey as I found myself on the edges of soul-crushing reality. It was indeed exhausting, intrinsically painful, and too much to bear.

Well, one tweet saved my sinking titanic.

It was from one of my mentor Ryan Holiday. He tweeted,

“Be quiet, work hard, and stay healthy. It’s not ambition or skill that is going to set you apart but sanity.”

It was at that moment I realized that my balance (balance of life in general) was messed up because I was actually lacking an important ingredient in the recipe of my self-made ‘Beautiful Struggle’ curry.

And that’s — peace of mind!

Two things.

One.

Beautiful Struggle!

‘Beautiful Struggle’ because you suffer for something beautiful for a period of time until you get what you want.

‘Beautiful Struggle’ because you struggle at an expense of your time otherwise spent on meager fun, entertainment and ephemeral-proxy-happiness.

And second.

Peace of mind.

‘Peace of mind’ — for it fuels and drives the rest of you — sustainably.

So, I promised I’d rather look inward than outward.

I’d rather focus on the calm than on the chaos that surrounds.

I’d rather chew on fragments of bigger problem than think about all the big problems that big problem will create.

I’d rather be sane and working than running wild and aimlessly.

Namaste.

p.s. A Big, Fat, Delicious Bonus here!

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30 minutes

Published January 13, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha

Bad days aren’t really bad. Give it 48 hours!

~I

Sajjan Raj Vaidya – Naganya Maya

We both looked at each other.

Our eyes moist, bloodshot, trying desperately to hide herself; the face melting, questioning; the surrounding air partly frozen, fully painful, all the more poisonous — we fishing cried.

Oh! We cried the fish out!

In the aftermath, some part of us revived.

Part of us died.

I reckon thoughts are more painful than the reality.

Hmm..

Now, as far as healing is concerned.

Healing, needs kindness.

Gentleness.

Calmness.

Forgiveness.

Healing — it merely needed a fresh perspective.

It needed an objective purpose.

It needed a good food with chilled soda.

It needed a brisk 30 minutes conversational walk!

Oh! We walked the fish out!

Namaste.

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dreams.

Published January 6, 2022 By Bijay Shrestha

No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.

~Heraclitus

Here to You – Tyler Brown Williams

Ever dreamt?

Every dream I once dreamt are coming true.

Dream more, dream brave — she whispers into my ears.

She adds, “And while you dream, and while the chase is on;

you’re also trading a fundamental asset that you will never get back — Time!”

Tonight, sleep on this;

Our full life is all about, as simple as — what we ‘actively’ do with our time!

Dreaming.

Discovering.

Becoming.

Acting.

Chasing.

Hustling.

Resting.

Practicing.

Recovering.

Perfecting.

Wasting!

Namaste.

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Earth angels

Published December 30, 2021 By Bijay Shrestha

It is not things that disturb us, but our interpretation of their significance.

~ Epictetus

Phillip LaRue – Carry You

Over a ride for grocery, I and my sister briefly talked about, ‘that ‘one’ person who’s enough for us to sail through life’s peaks and valleys’. The same evening she published a quote on her facebook wall from Anna that says, “Some people appear in your life when you need them most. They love you & lift you up reminding you of the best even when you’re going through the worst. These people are not just friends they are Earth angels.. “. I know she wouldn’t do it unless she strongly feels something deeply personal in her heart.

And that thought of her thought has been with me since.

My sister’s name is Sabi Shrestha. She is my ‘earth angel’ for sure. Matter of fact, she is without-a-question — an earth angel for so many people. And, most certainly ‘Angels’ also needs angels!

Well, I don’t know about me being anybody’s angel
but — I just hope i can share

‘her’ weights,

her plights,

her delights too.

I hope I can be there for her whenever … wherever she needs me to be.

She deserves ‘earth angels’ or whatever we call them!

Again,

She is my ‘Ram Shankar Nikumbh’.

She has been my earth angel! She still is.

Again,

She is an earth angel for so many!

Namaste.

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Responsibility

Published December 23, 2021 By Bijay Shrestha


“Treat yourself like you are someone you are responsible for helping.” ~ Dr. Jordan Peterson

we’ll be fine – Luz

I had long been following breadcrumbs left by Dr. Jordan Peterson. Recently, I even requested a photo print of him to my best friend.

He has been my mentor,

my father figure,

my favorite author,

my favorite intellect, and superlatively,

my favorite human.

He says, the true meaning and purpose of ones life — lies in willingness and the capacity to take (or self-conduct ourselves evenly despite) more responsibilities than merely sleepwalking adhering to the impractical junks such as ‘You Only Live Once’, or ‘Life’s about pursuit of Happiness’, or ‘Thank God It’s Friday’, and many more commercialized bull-craps.

His latest two books — 12 Rules for Life, and Beyond Order delicately encapsulates the crucial lack and thereof the dire necessity of taking responsibility for the sake of a fulfilling life.

James Clear also writes,

“Life rarely changes in a positive way without an increase in responsibility. 

That can mean taking ownership of your health or committing to a relationship or starting a business. 

Whatever it is, if you want the trajectory to change, the amount of responsibility usually has to change.”

Whence,

if you’re reading this —

Stop chasing happiness,

Stop painting fake pictures,

And, start growing responsibility muscle.

Be responsible!

Upgrade your responsibilities!

Namaste!

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Three sieves

Published December 16, 2021 By Bijay Shrestha

Four things belong to a judge: to hear courteously, to answer wisely, to consider soberly, and to decide impartially. ~ Socrates

Giveon – Heartbreak Anniversary

It’s been hell of a week.

Last Thursday, I had my Finals and the next morning I were to fly to Seattle.

Thus, apologies for the Musicpervs inconsistency there!

Today, the thing I’m about to share is a small fragment of information from series of conversations I and Manish were having on the way back his home at around 1230AM of December 17, 2021.

Well, chew what you can muster!

Socrates during his time had an immense reputation for his thought provoking and profound tank of wisdom.

One fine day, a man came to him and said, “Do you know what I heard about your friend?”

“A moment”, replied Socrates. “Before you tell me, I would like to test you with the three sieves.”

“The Three Sieves?“, what’s that? Asked the man in bewilderment.

“Yes”, continued Socrates. “Before telling me anything about the other, it’s good to take sometime to filter what you mean, I call it the test of the three sieves.”

First, have you verified what you’re going to tell me is true?

No, I just heard it.

I see, So you don’t know if it’s true. Never mind. Let’s go with the second sieve. What you want to tell me about my friend, is it good?

Oh, no no, but it’s the opposite.

Hmm.. so you want to tell me bad things about him and you’re not even sure if they’re true, questioned Socrates.

Maybe you can still pass the test of the third sieve. Socrates went to ask, “Is it useful that I know what you’re going to tell me about this friend?”

Not really!

Thus, concluded Socrates, what you were going to tell me has neither the proof of TRUTH, nor it’s KIND and also isn’t of any UTILITY then — why did you want to tell me this anyway?

Takeaways.

Before you speak anything, 3 things to look for:

  1. Is it true? Truth.
  2. Is it kind? Kindness.
  3. Is it of any good use? Utility.

Namaste.

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