In the early 2015, I’d read a classic, deep-shit by one of my mentor, Dr. Friedrich Nietzsche, who was also a very hard-core german philosopher by profession.

In his book, Human, All Too Human: A Book for Free Spirits, he’d instructeded,

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

I remember, as soon as i read that hot, sexy, steaming line in the book; it was nothing short of Holy fuck! moment on me.

Because, that was it! That was fucking it! — the true skin, flesh and bones of a very successful failed relationship was all naked there!

Since then, I’ve been measuring my own romanticism’s depth and breadth from this dependable compass long offered to us by Mr. Nietzsche for fucking free.

p.s. ensues the feels of writing “3AM friend.“ .

---

Okay, so, let’s put your love into test through the same microscope.

Shall we?

Let’s begin.

A simple inquiry or self-reflection will do. That, with your partner, are you fucking sure that you guys are THE best of friends?

[pause]

[think]

[connect the dots]

[you’re good at making patterns by evolution — fucking make one here real quick]

[still thinking]

[still reading]

[think] ….

---

Now, if your answer is ‘No’

Fucking leave pal, before it’s too late.

Bonus: if you want to dig in a little bit more as to why I say that (in a heartbeat); read this article by one of my mentor Mr. James Clear ( the author of Atomic Habits)

Contrarily, if your reaction to that same question is

‘Hell! FooooooOking Yeah’ << [click that link]

Then, you’re without-a-shred-of doubt, one hell of a fortunate big time cracker!

Again, if you don’t buy my view on the matter, here’s the world’s oldest longitudinal study done on happiness at Harvard, backing up that claim.

---

To the nutshell, I’d request you all to make fucking sure that you’ve all the ingredients of full moon friendship before you would decide to put an end to your fuckaround-behavior, and actually marry your dream partner in crime.

Virtues like :-

Honesty.

Trust.

Respect.

Humility.

Understanding.

Support.

Unconditional love.

Kindness.

Care.

Warmth! Friendship! Friendship!

And, most certainly, (a not to miss)

A Holy Fucking humor.

Yes, make sure you tick all those boxes before deciding to fire your fucking shuttle ae’!

Good luck!

Nites!!

✌️& ❤️

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Self Reminder.

That’s all you get from me this week.

As a matter of fact, if you pay close attention; that’s all there is to live a peaceful, full life and sure, death too.

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Understating and understanding, that nothing must matter. That, Nothing will matter — was a ball dropper.

This was a necessary respite, in the face of occasional, excruciating drama — life sometimes malignantly inflicts upon us, whether we want it or not! Whether we’re prepared for it or not!

---

Before going any further, I want to be clear on one thing :-

And that is…

To me, becoming wise, is not a swank.

Instead, it has always been about my surgical curiosity to learn more. The obsession, precisely.

To me, it’s a shameless journey of my journey. (Shameless, because I still don’t know much about so many things.)

It has always been like that and it’s worked for me thus far.

---

Around the same token, one of my dead friends, Marcus Aurelius, suggested, “Life is opinion.”

Dope!

Laconic.

Fucking Powerful!

Nuclear!

---

I remember, I’d cried many times over someone else’s poor judgements over me, my substance, my character, nature. And, my family have also shed tears for the same unsexy cause.

Also, my recent read The Art of Possibility: Transforming Professional and Personal Life.’ by Rosamund Stone Zander wherein she argues around the same lines as Aurelius intended. She writes, “It’s all invented. Everything in life is an invention. The way we see things. The way we measure things. The way we compete. The way we judge ourselves.”

---

So, Folks, the world is ever-changing. It will change more.

Life, well,.. sadly more often than not– ruminates around the inevitable suite of poorly-formed, ephemeral opinions which our heart and minds blindly, and dearly hold for us. Without objectivity, without weight, without real inquiry!

So, Folks,

at times, with time —

Unfuck.

Change.

p.s.

p.p.s.

On a side note, I’d also recommend you dig more on — Memento mori too.

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“A year from now you will wish you had started today.”

~  Karen Lamb

No instagram. No whatsapp. Facebook had been long trashed out of the window for as many as half a decade years. No viber.

Yes, Presently. Yes, SoundHeal. Yes, long breathes. Yes meditation. Yes, GYM. Yes zumba. Yes, Spotify Premium (thanks to didi). Twitter has always been a handy pal to keep (however, i deliberately self-indulge with her, sparingly, carefully). Yes, iBooks. Yes, real books. Yes, more code katas’. Yes, real shits!

Why I unplugged?

Simple. We live in a time where we’ve set ourselves to so many priorities, each competing for our priceless time.

No wonder, we’re all ridiculously busy, aren’t we?

But, I’m rather curious how much of our Business proxy is at our favor?

How much?

Again, no wonder, we don’t have time for ourselves too. Just look at your daily rat-race infested routine. Commitments and Responsibilities. And yeah, Phones. Awful Fuck!

Sure enough, we’re mostly sleep walking, taking everything on and along or way for fucking granted!

Or at least, such had been my reality for such a long time.

Context

I was never a phone person. And, I still keep her at a fine distance. But after so many messages, and unattended calls. After such many beautiful people expectantly waiting for my text/ call back. I just wanted to breathe, briefly! All for myself!

That’s mostly why!

Goonja di. Puku. Manish. Didi. Mummy. Daddy. Dai (twin brother). SV — one way or the other would advise :- Live a little for yourself. Openly. Selfishly. Selflessly.

FuKingly!

Intentionally.

Freely!

Duly.

Reclaiming what’s mine; my freedom, my s.e.l.f, thus, on a digital sabbatical mode indefinitely.

Hopefully I’ll be back soon!

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FISHER – LOSING IT

There used to be times when we were crazy over hoarding musics from 8tracks and share em’ a lot! This was before Spotify, Apple music, or YouTube for us. This was before I had any girlfriends!

😄😄

There used to be times when we use to work our ass off for 38 hours straight and still return back home content and cherry. Islington College will forever rock in our memories.

There used to be times when we use to delight over mo:mos and milk-tea and bike rides of Patan.

Our deep shit conversations late at night.

Our undisclosed, naked plights.

Our bantam secrets.

Our pure, once in a lifetime friendship-starship!

Our hours.

Our ours.

There used to be times when we use to think of being together — for forever!

There used to be times when all todays’ were effortlessly fecking awesome!

Tangal baucha, your playlist’s ready!

And, if anyone would like to have the playlist shared, please comment below with your email.

Bonus:

VINI VICI & ALOK & SKAZI – LOOSE A ROCKSTAR (PSYTRANCE)

FISHERF – LOSING IT

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On the way back home this evening; as I drove past dusts and the dark, I cried again.

Cried for my wretched parts.

Cried for my unpopular, unbeknownst past.

I’ve known sobbing helps.

And, tears are a blessing when the pain is real, when the cut is rich!

Because, if you don’t know it yet, It’s how you actually heal yourself.

Despite, on most calendar days, you pretend to be strong and full but there are also days, you want to wear down that mask and just be by your all-self!

Well, tonight is one of those nights for me.

Immersive. Vulnerable. Reflective.

A whisper cries from within; Says, “You are enough, You know you are enough, stupid! You’re enough!”

[A thoughtful break. With deep, deep long breathes]

Taking a digital sabbatical vacation, I.

Tired.

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There’s a little hope in everything.

— reads his current facebook cover photo’s caption.

He’d been working at F1soft since May of 2014. I joined the club on December 31st, the same year.

Prelude: From our ‘तिमी‘ to ‘त‘, our journey together has brought me an immense joy as well as a deeper sense of fulfillment by virtue of our natural brotherhood chemistry. And, he’ll for sure have a special place in my life forever of forever!

But, hey, before you read any further, let’s be clear on one thing :- this is not about Pukar’s story. Truth be told, I’ve barely tracked or scratched his life’s timeline and plots and whereabouts.

But, sure, this is about him!

without any fragment of exaggeration!

Alright then, Let’s begin!

It’s in the name. ‘Puku‘ — is a kind man.

Doppelgänger of Samwell Tarley.

Ultralinx diehard. Designer (UI/UX) by profession.

Go, Hire him! And you won’t regret.

Cute. Chubby. Cerebral. Caring. Yes, the Johnny-on-the-spot too.

Soft spoken. Warm. Pure of the Purity! Parent’s son! A one woman man!

हिस्त पुस्त । ज्ञानी।असल।

Amiable, Pukuman!

A genuine comrade, thick as thieves — a friend from another mother and father. A conjugal by-product of Pushpa & Pushkar brooos’.

Cosmopolitan. Life and the light of a room. Any room!

Hands down, down to earth.

Our Double meaning Guru.

Fun to be around. Funny! Hell, hell-ious funny!

One who delights in fine food. The mighty lord Gastronomer.

Perhaps aspiring photographer. Creative. Likes watches (i think). Wishes for Navy blue all the time (pants, shirt, jacket, hmm….).

Vivid listener. Honest. Sincere. Trustworthy. Respectful. Mostly, straight. Straight!

You know what i mean.

Someone who has weird obsession with his leg photography.

Go, check out his instagram.

Someone who has a quirky habit around suit and tie.

Fan of England Football Team — more specifically Chelsea FC.

Someone who tries his best to organize his shits.

Again, take a look at his instagram.

Dependable.

Someone who takes responsibilities dead & dead seriously!

Star Wars. DC. Justice League. Deadpool. Holy! hard core Papon, Prateek Kuhad cum John Mayer admirer.Not to miss the Nepali products (@mheecha, @anthropose, @bhavproducts, karuna, what the fook not) plus Mumford & Sons, Radiohead on the list as well.

Adorable wisecracker. Sarcasm powerhouse!

Bhaley. Bhanubhakta and Lord Buddha.

As Seneca beautifully explains,

[su_quote]“If you consider any man a friend whom you do not trust as you trust yourself, you are mightily mistaken and you do not sufficiently understand what true friendship means… When friendship is settled, you must trust; before friendship is formed, you must pass judgment…Ponder for a long time whether you shall admit a given person to your friendship; but when you have decided to admit him, welcome him with all your heart and soul. Speak as boldly with him as with yourself… Regard him as loyal and you will make him loyal.” — Letters from a Stoic.[/su_quote]

It’s because of human like himself, I can believe in the words of the wise that friendship must be fucking unconditional as love ought to be.

Lastly, Pukar bro — yaar, don’t kill me for any of this!

• 

p.s. Once, my source of good, subtle, suple music.

INEXPLICABLY fortunate to have found.

Now, HYAPPILY married!

Melophile.

• 

Pardon, the jargon.
Pardon profanity of our nighttime conversation.

Good night everyone!

p.p.s

• 

Early morning circus.

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Do not cast pearls before swine.

Matthew 7:6

A concise segue could be something more like ,”Pull Back From People Who Won’t Listen To You.” Or “Know your audience”, as they say. Or more so directly, “If people are not listening to you, stop talking to them!“

Cold. Isn’t it?

Let’s unpack.

What this simply means is: If you’re talking to someone or say trying to have a conversation but as it turns out that this person is no where near listening to what you have to say (by virtue of their deeply possessed stone-etched rigidity), then more often than not, it’s at your best interest that you shut the fuck up and save yourself an insult!

Why am i saying this?

Paraphrasing Jordan B. Peterson (one among many of my mentors); what he says is that — in cases like this, the one we’re right now putting a microscope on; there could only be two prospective certainties :-

One, if you somehow feel that the other person is not trying to engage and rather oxygenate conflicts after conflicts then you aren’t who they think you are.

Or, two, you’re not where you think you are! On plain sight, you are just somewhere you don’t belong! Not at least around a good influence!

Because you see, when you’re with people who don’t really listen, there’s no real dialogue occurring between you two, and sure enough this person you merely think you’re having a meaningful conversation with is clearly not interested in your say of the matter. And, by giving them your time and energy, you are just devaluing what you have to say by offering to an audience that reject it.

So, why give a fuck at all!

Peterson further advises, “If you stop talking to people who aren’t listening to you and start watching them instead, they’ll tell you what they’re up to.”

Choose wisely.

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