No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man
Heraclitus
This is absolutely random. These are few highlights of my lowly life in the past.
I was a boy who use to dream in my dream of owning an iPod shuffle — for the love of music. That little music player device launched by Apple on January of 2005. It was priced mere $99 for a base model then; Light years ahead of my acquisition aspiration.
I was a boy who long before I was able to afford a Honda Grazia, had to take public transports for almost 7 years right after high school, and have been through all the worst nuances possible that a public commuter goes through day-in-day-out.
I was a boy who have had to work for 3 months without pay in one of the software firm for the love of learning how to code.
I was a boy who couldn’t afford to rent an academic regalia also known as cap and gown for my undergrad. In that pretext, I remember Mr. Soong (then CAO of Islington College) teaching me never to beg for anything in life and rather earn it.
I was a boy who have had to earn enough to save enough to pay for my study since my high school. I had realized very young that I have to be the steward of my own ship.
I was a boy who was always dead broke no matter how much my paychecks went up over time.
I was a boy who had forgotten how to smile,.. how to laugh, how to connect to people. At times I’d deliberately watch comedy movies or something alike just so that I can stimulate the dopamine rush
I was a boy who’ve had tons of rejections. Name it. Europe. US. Girl.
I was a boy who’ve shed handsome volume of lonesome tears.
After almost one and half years of stressful application development experience on a startup firm , I had yet to go through the worst phase of my career as a manager. I was a lead of a new team that I inherited (didn’t form the team on my own), and remarkably failed at building connection with the old folks of that team. Self doubts, Gaslights. Anxiety. Insomnia. Anger. Rage. Unfair Judgements — were on the buffet. Maybe it’s my fault. Maybe it was just another lesson round the corner.
So many twists and turns in education.
So many twists and turns in profession.
So many twists and turns in life in toto.
I was a boy who’ve had to do a lot of mistakes to learn my lessons and navigate through life’s pacific.
Looking back, I adore these episodes of my life.
Looking back, I am grateful they happened.
Made in Mudpuddle.
I am better now.
Namaste.